trying to tear apart something that had already ended

thats what scares me the most
the end
the fact that everything that meant so much
is nothing now
and i feel cold

even in these sheets
meant to be shield
my feet are still cold
sending shivers
of how i feel

lost
like everything was a waste of time
because it got us nowhere
it brought us ten steps back
back to where we said "forever"
not knowing it would never last

ive been trying so hard for this poetry
but these streets i grew up on
abandon me
as if it never meant a thing
blood was shed
like the autumn leaves

crimson red with october
burning sage and four leaf clovers
they never did a thing
but raise hope for a lost cause
and tear me apart
with my faith in a god