typical stoned 18 year old

i wonder if youre focusing on all of the differences
let them spite me
where i fit in
and where i dont
i focus on idealizing things
trying to misplace the real feelings
i know im not who you want me to be

begging for you to change the things which dont suit
purging all i built up
for empty promises that will make me believe
i will be redeemed for staying mute

but i let the spaces in between tear me up
geared to skip
appearing where you let
i know im not enough

but i make people who dont even know me
influence how much i think i mean
posing like a mannequin
but manically recognizing i dont have the muscle span

its too easy to wrap my heart around
this idea i think you demand
but knowing better
ill seem desperate
being honest
ill try to be anything you've ever wanted

i'll turn the volume down
and hope the fuzz doesnt follow
and i'll change my mind on former passions
my eyes could rest
the white light blurred my mind out anyway at best
and it let my heart get ahead
some stupid misfortune
understandably coming from the territory
of an eighteen year old girl
burning to let words have a turn

its everything i shouldn't be anyway
another thing i base my self worth on
an ability which should be taken away from me
always voting for the other team