Bitch

she said she'd be back
although reeking of cigarettes and alcohol
and not knowing what i lack,
said she loves me because i have it all

and i hate to take it back
but i used to love you with all i had
but you know what they say about what we have
most of the time, it becomes what we had

and though i miss
the juxtapose position
of your heart and your body
i know what i cant be

love you cause youre lovely
hate you cause you couldnt love me
fuck the presenting
like you could be mending

know those things happen slowly
but i wanted you to know me
forgot what close means
to you, its nothing

and i hate to say
i felt every piece breaking
hurt more than the making
knowing you couldnt save me

you said you could promise me
as if you know what a promise means
love you for your honesty
hate you cause you lied to me

hate how when its over
you become everything i need
and in that moment, i felt everything bending
i couldnt bleed

i couldnt breathe
cause honesty happened too unexpetedly

i would rather not know
i could be content
with not knowing how my hearts been spent
or better said, bent

i could be content
with the distance
you were always far enough away
to make me wanna stay

why did that have to change?
why couldnt we be okay with the way we lay?
although half-hearted and lonely
i thought i was the only

but there were little things aaron told me
that broke the most important things
like who i wanted you to be
but i guess thats what you get for expecting

i should have known better
you are who you said you would be
made you something in my mind
something too lovely

i remember getting drunk
and saying i love your silhouette
and i miss your bed
even if the reason i was there was in my head

and i love the places i was lead
when im nostalgic for the feelings bread
showed me love i hadnt known i wanted
so you could get what i didnt realize you wanted

i guess thats where ill find myself haunted
like a net ive been caught in